Obituary of Sean Casey

Sean Casey passed away peacefully on August 6, 2024, at the age of 58 years old from his four-year fight with lung cancer. 

Sean was born January 7, 1966, in Brooklyn, New York to William and Elizabeth Casey.  He is survived by his wife Nancy, and his children Emily and Matthew.  He lived in Brooklyn, New York 33 years and Staten Island, New York 25 years. 

We had a lovely wake, funeral, burial and bereavement luncheon.  It was downright beautiful.  Sean wanted a big traditional funeral and he, of course, was right about that.  He was so intelligent.  I initially thought it was for him, but it really was for his family and friends.  The outpouring of love and support from our family and friends was so comforting and brought tremendous meaning to Sean’s life.  I never wanted to say this was a celebration of his life, but ultimately it truly was.  I smiled and cried like wailing widow throughout. 

I needed to write an obituary before the wake, but there was so much to do.  I was asked to post my eulogy online, for some missed it.  This could be too much information, but I am so proud of the love I have for Sean.  Here is my eulogy… 

What I am about to say, only touches on how much I loved Sean. I could say much, much, more about him. 

Good evening, family and friends.  I want to say upfront how much your love and support means to us at this very difficult time.  People have told me to rest and of course I stayed up all night looking at photos and the beautiful memories we had with dear Sean.  I just could not prepare in any way for his passing.  It is truly painful how much I already miss him.  

Sean Casey was my best friend for 33 years, more than half my life.  We just had our 25^th wedding anniversary.  When I met him, he said he was going to make me his girlfriend and I laughed at him.  Then he asked me to come to his family’s annual St. Patty’s Day party.  I asked, “Can I bring someone?”  I thought it could be dangerous for I did not know him.  He said of course and I brought Maria. It was a fun party and I saw the wonderful family life he had and it impressed me.  So, we started dating.  After I finished college and passed the CPA exam I said, “Okay Sean, we can get married now.”  He said, “Oh, we were waiting for you?”  I said, “Of course!”  We had a wonderful wedding.  Throughout his life he called me his beautiful bride. He used to say I was the most beautiful woman in the room.  He always sent two dozen roses to my job for Valentine’s Day which is also close to my birthday.  He bought me jewelry for years until I demanded he stop for I had enough. He was a romantic, supporting, loving husband and father.  

Sean loved children.  We have been blessed to have Emily and Matthew in our lives.  He was so proud of them and was so involved in their lives.  He went to all their activities and gave them all his wisdom.  One time Sean, Matt and I were having lunch and he was giving us information about something and I said to him, “Boy, you are the Master of Knowledge!”  The table next to us turned around, for they had to see just who a “Master of Knowledge” looked like. It was hilarious and I never let that go. I always admired his intelligence. And funny thing is, he used to say I was the smartest person he knew, which was such a compliment. 

Sean was a family man.  I found it odd that he only wanted to go on vacations and outings with his very close family.  However, that actually made it easier to find photos of him. On vacation he loved sunrises and sunsets and had hundreds of those photos on his phone. He always thanked me for the wonderful vacation we had.  

Sean always looked forward to family gatherings and supporting his family.  He said for years that we have been lucky that no one passed away.  And now there has been a lot of loss. 

Sean had a big personality.  He had strong principles and beliefs.  He was very stubborn. I thought of him as the Fighting Irish.  He wanted things a certain way.  Nevertheless, I understood him and I respected him.  

Sean was a very funny person.  He always made me laugh. When my mom visited and if she was worried about something, he knew exactly what to say to make her laugh. 

Sean maintained a beautiful garden at our home and worked on keeping our house and his garage in good order.  Being a Custodian Engineer, my basement’s pipes are all properly labeled as to their purpose.  He was a hardworking man. 

I made Sean retire almost two years ago to enjoy life without work, however, he did not want to retire, for he was too young and he wanted to make sure his family was provided for.  Sean worked for the Department of Education.  He was a Stationary Engineer 9 years and a Custodian Engineer 22 years.  On September 11, 2001 he was in charge of a Public School located at 201 Warren Street, near the World Trade Center.  He witnessed the disaster and saw the tremendous smoke and debris approach his building.  He was acknowledged as “having the presence of mind to shut off the ventilation system, rendering the school one of the few buildings in lower Manhattan that didn’t suck the contaminants into the building.”  During and after the disaster, he was in charge of operating the school, which was converted into a command center for Office of Emergency Management, to support firefighters and police officers.  He was thanked by the NYC Dept of Ed for his professionalism and dedication and was “Hailed as the School’s Hero” by the principal of the school.  Unfortunately, from the many months of working at ground zero, he ultimately got cancer. Sadly, his cousin Michael also succumbed to cancer 3 years ago at the age of 45 years old and he worked right across the street from Sean. 

Sean did everything possible to stay alive these last 4 years.  He was 58.5 years old.  He was a very strong man, both physically and mentally to the end.  He passed away peacefully, with Emily, Matthew, Suzanne, Billy and me at his side at Memorial Sloan Kettering, from which he received the best of care. He knew his parents wanted to be there for him and could not make it and that was okay.  We were there to soothe him and let him to go heaven. 

For our 25^th wedding anniversary, I gave him two cards that he loved.  One said:

You’re the one who knows my stories

Gets my jokes

Takes my side

Ignores my quirks

Finishes my sentences

Soothes my worries

You’re the one who makes all my days better

And somehow makes me better

Happy Anniversary.

And then I added, this card truly says it all except how much I love you. We made a great team, built a beautiful home with wonderful children.

Sean loved this card. 

The last thing I want to say was inspired from someone who sent me a message recently.  Sean and I made a great team.  I do know he was grateful to have me by his side.  I was his angel here on earth, and now he will be my angel from heaven.  He was the love of my life and I will miss him terribly.  It’s going to be so difficult finding a different normal without him. 

Written with Love by Nancy