Helping Men Express their Grief

By: Matthew Funeral Home
Monday, January 16, 2023

Grief is a very powerful emotional response to a heartbreaking event. After the loss of a loved one, the grief can be overwhelming. However, most men tend to internalize emotional responses. Traditionally speaking, women tend to be more open about their feelings, whereas most men try to remain stoic at funerals. This is often because of societal norms and wanting to seem “masculine.” However, expressing emotions is healthy, and it is best not to bottle up feelings. While everyone grieves differently, it can be helpful to help your loved one let out their emotions, rather than bottling them up. This article will explore how to help your husband, brother, father, son, or another male relative deal with their grief in a healthy manner. 

Internalization vs Emotional Responses

The internalization of feelings is a defensive mechanism to prevent one from having to deal with them. This is just a temporary solution and does not help your loved one deal with the emotions that they are feeling. However, not everyone will have a very emotional response. Pushing your loved one to open up will probably only frustrate them. Help them open up by asking them to talk about how they are feeling, and don’t force them to share. 

Doing over Expressing

Expressing emotions doesn’t come easily to everyone. Sometimes, it is best to encourage your loved one to do something that helps them express their feelings. This can be easier for those who are typically uncomfortable with emotions. Encourage them to dive into a favorite hobby, or to try something new. It might help them to try out a hobby that was a favorite of the deceased. Exercise can also be a healthy outlet for grief when done safely. 

All-Male Support Groups

Maintaining a sense of masculinity is often a major reason why men find it difficult to express intense emotions of grief. Encourage your loved one to go to an all-male support group. Most men who go to support groups can find comfort in seeing others in a similar situation. A support group may help them find a safe place to open up. This can be one of the best outlets for your loved one, should you manage to get them to go.

Individual Grief Counseling and Therapy

Individualized counseling or therapy can be an incredibly effective resource for your loved one. However, many people, men especially, can be apprehensive about seeing a therapist or counselor. If your loved one is open to the idea, you should encourage them to seek individual treatment for their grief. Talking with a professional counselor can help your loved one work through their emotions in a healthy and private manner.

The author of this post is not a professional therapist or counselor. For assistance in finding a grief counselor that is right for you, there are a number of resources out there. For our Grief Resource Center, written by Dr. Bill Webster, click here.  
For over 50 years, Matthew Funeral Home has been serving the Staten Island community. We can help with almost every aspect of your loved one’s memorial service. Our family is here to serve yours, every step of the way.

Leave a comment
Please enter the numbers and letters you see in the image. Note that the case of the letters entered matters.


Please wait

Previous Posts

How Does Cremation Work?

Most people understand that cremation is a process by which the remains of the deceased are burned and converted to ashes. But there are many steps to the process in order to ensure that everything...

What To Do When a Loved One Passes

When a loved one passes, there is going to be a lot of pain and grief. Loved ones will need to be contacted and brought together. But there are also a few practical steps that need to be taken, as ...

Combating Senior Loneliness After the Loss of a Spouse

After the loss of an elderly loved one, their spouse can feel incredibly lonely. After spending a long time with a partner, losing a spouse can be difficult. For many, this is a time of learning to...

Why You Should Consider Cremation

Cremation is a topic that many people may find uncomfortable or difficult to discuss. For a long time, it was not accepted by many major religions, most notably Catholicism. However, it is an impor...

Leaving Your Digital Assets Behind in 2023

The internet has evolved in many ways since the advent of the smartphone. And more people use social media and other websites to express themselves daily. Many elderly individuals have learned how ...

Essential Coping Tools When Dealing With Loss

After the loss of a loved one, you may feel like your whole life is turned upside down. And after dealing with funeral arrangements and families coming in from out of town, it can be hard to pick u...

Supporting a Bereaved Coworker

When a coworker has a death in the family, it can be important to support them during their difficult time. There is no clear-cut or easy way to help someone who is grieving. But lending a supporti...

Processing Anger in Grief

Anger is the second stage of grief, and it is often one of the hardest to deal with. Anger can be a raw emotion, and it is easy to be overwhelmed during your grief. This article will discuss how an...

What Does My Religion Say About Cremation?

Cremation is rapidly becoming more and more popular in America, with a projected over 54% of Americans opting to cremate in 2020. If you or a loved one are considering choosing cremation for your e...

Reasons You May Want to Contest A Will

After your loved one passes, their Will will be presented, if they have one. It is possible that you have some issues with how your loved one has divided their estate. Generally, an individual shou...