Can You Make it to the Wake?

By: Matthew Funeral Home
Monday, May 7, 2018


When someone passes away, it is expected for friends and family alike to gather to say their final farewells. Many people understand the solemn obligation of attending a funeral or wake; but some people may be unsure if they can attend the end-of-life celebration. If you are questioning whether or not you can attend the event, ask yourself these questions. A wake is, for many people, a place for closure, a place to make peace with their loved one’s passing, and a place to say their last goodbyes.

Relationship to the Deceased

Your relation to the deceased and/or their immediate family should be the first determining factor on if you can make it. Even if you do not know the deceased personally, but you are close with a family member, it may be a good idea to show your support by going. You should ask yourself these questions to help determine whether or not you should try your best to go. When did you last speak with them? How well do you know the family or the individual? What is the nature of your relationship to the deceased, or a family member? 

Distance to the Wake

Wakes aren’t always a stone’s throw away. You might need to consider travel time and how to get there if you are determining if you can go. For distant funerals, it may sometimes be a question if it is even possible to go. If the funeral is close to home, it will be of course more feasible to go than one 4 hours away. Travelling for a wake can be made easier by seeing who else is going, and travelling together.

Timing

No death is timely. The passing of a loved one puts the lives of those affected on hold as plans need to be made, forms filled out, and grief sets in. But as for attendants of the wake; sometimes you just can not make it. A new project at work, a sick child, or other life events can make you unavailable. In this case, you should be sure to express your condolences to the family. If you are close with the family, you might want to apologize for being unable to go.

Your Health

If you are unable to make it to a funeral because of your personal health, then it would be understandable to miss it. You should still try your best to express your condolences to the family and show them that they and their loved one are in your thoughts. As little as a phone call can make a difference to the family.

If You Can’t Go

It happens to all of us. You may not be able to attend the wake or funeral for any number of reasons. It is still important to show respect and send your regards to the family of the deceased. If you are unable to go to the wake because of timing, distance, or your health; sending flowers can express your condolences and brighten the moods of the mourners. Flowers are a visual representation of your love and sympathy. They are the best way to honor the memory of your loved one. You can even send flowers to the home of the family, instead of the funeral home. 

For almost 50 years, Matthew Funeral Home has been serving the Staten Island community. We can help with almost every aspect of your loved one’s memorial service. Our family is here to serve yours, every step of the way.

Leave a comment
Name*:
Email:
Comment*:
Please enter the numbers and letters you see in the image. Note that the case of the letters entered matters.

Comments

Please wait

Previous Posts

Alcohol Abuse and Grief

When grieving, many people turn to things that can comfort or distract them from the pain. It is not uncommon for some people to reach for a bottle of alcohol for this. For many people, alcohol can...

A Guide to Sympathy Meals

When a friend or family member passes away, people may send sympathy meals to the immediate family. Sympathy meals are a good way to show your support for the family while providing them with a mea...

Aging Loved Ones and Care Options

The elderly stage of life can be a difficult time for many people. As time goes on, you may notice that your aging loved one is moving slower, unable to take care of themselves properly, or becomin...

Donating to a Charity Post-Mortem

It feels good to help others. Whether you donate your time or money, helping a charitable cause is a good way to help those in need. It is not uncommon for altruistic individuals to leave some sort...

Grief After The Loss of A Pet

Pets are always there for us. They greet us at the door when we come home, they keep us company, and they comfort us when we need cheering up. Your pets aren’t just animals, they are an essential p...

Jewish Funeral Rites are Eco-Friendly

While green burials tend to be a newer concept, making choices in your funeral plans to be more eco-friendly is not. In fact, the Jewish faith and tradition tend to follow more eco-friendly practic...

Showing Support If You Miss The Funeral

Funerals are a time to say a final goodbye to those lost, and a chance to come together in mourning. The funeral is also a time to provide support to those closest to the deceased. If you are unabl...

Remembering Those Who Served

As Memorial Day is on the horizon, we look for ways to honor those who have fought for our country. Memorial Day for many people is a time for barbeques and parades. But, many people have lost a cl...

Event: Learn About Memorial Day

Matthew Funeral Home is offering an opportunity for children of the community to learn about Memorial Day. Join us for a memorial mass and a tribute to those who served our country on Monday, May 3...

Religious Holidays and Losing the Older Generation

With religious holidays such as Easter, Ramadan, and Passover just around the corner, it is common for those of faith to follow their respective traditions. As more of the younger generations becom...