Etiquette for Donating In a Loved One's Name

Some individuals or their families request donations to charity in place of flowers during the bereavement period. Most families will appreciate the donation in their loved one’s name. Especially if your donation is to a charity close to the heart of the deceased. This article will explore the etiquette expected when making a memorial donation in honor of the deceased. 

Making a Donation in the Deceased’s Name

When donating in a loved one’s name, be sure to include “In memory of” or “In loving memory of” as part of the donation. Many online services for donations will include a place to denote memorial donations such as this. It is generally proper etiquette to the chosen charity within 10 days of the funeral service. This allows the family to include you in the thank you notes after the funeral. Be sure to inform the charity of the name and address of the deceased’s family, so that they can be notified of the donation. You should include their address even if you are donating anonymously. 

The Family’s Choice of Charity

Most families will designate the charity, or a group of charities, to whom they would like the donations to be sent to. If any charities are designated, it is best not to deviate from those. Many families will pick a charity that is close to the heart of the deceased. The deceased may have left specific choices of charities to support, as well. If the deceased was lost to a specific ailment, it is common for families to choose charities focusing on treatment and care. An example of this might be a cancer research facility or an ALS support charity.

Choosing a Charity Yourself

However, if no charities are specified, you could pick one yourself. In this case, it is important to do some research. You want to ensure that you are giving to a good organization and one that would fit the wishes of the deceased. Remember that you are donating in their name, not yours. Several websites can help you. The Better Business Bureau’s Wise Giving Alliance provides info on charities, including 20 Standards for Charity Accountability. Charity Watch also provides a similar service in researching charities. These tools can help you make an informed decision for your donations.

Should I Donate Anonymously?

Most charities will allow you to donate in memory of a loved one anonymously. It is up to you if you want the bereaved to know that you donated in their loved one’s name. While it can be good to show your love and support through donations, you may choose to remain anonymous. It is ultimately up to you. At the end of the day, the important thing is that you are donating as a tribute to a loved one. 

Sympathy Cards for your Donation

Some people prefer to inform the family of the deceased via a sympathy card. In addition to your own words of sympathy, consider including a message such as “Our family remembered (Name) by donating to (Charity)”

Matthew Funeral Home does not provide medical, legal, or financial advice via articles. This material has been prepared for informational purposes only. It is not intended to provide, and should not be relied on for legal, financial, or medical advice.
For over 50 years, Matthew Funeral Home has been serving the Staten Island community. We can help with almost every aspect of your loved one’s memorial service. Our family is here to serve yours, every step of the way.